I'm doing it, I'm doing it!

Ok, I am managing....I've been sick, I've had almost every possible thing happen, and I'm still doing it and making it. Whew....I'm exhausted by the end of the day, but we're making it work. And Can I just say that I'm pretty proud of myself? I even made it to church on Sunday. By myself. I think I've only done that one other time. I was terrified that I would just lose it in the middle of church and end up sobbing uncontrollably. I didn't, thankfully, and I think that I just might be able to manage it again. :)

This weekend....I'm ready for this weekend. Hubby gets to come home...only for the weekend, but that's ok, because he'll be HOME! I can't tell you how excited I am....I don't think there are enough words in the English dictionary!

Funny side note....I was thinking back a few weekends ago, about a conversation between my brother in law and Zack. Justin asked Zack what he wanted to be when he grew up. Zack said an NBA player. Justin asked what if that didn't work out. Zack said an NFL player. Justin said what if that doesn't work out? Zack said, well then a rock star! Dream big, baby, dream big! :)

UGH!

It's been just over a week now, and things are, well the same. I still miss him like crazy. The kids still miss him like crazy. It seems as though he's on one hell of a long work trip. Only this one will last...forever. Ugh. They say it gets easier with time. It does not. They're lying. He's not dead. Thank GOD! I know we'll see him again. Still doesn't make it any easier. I sincerely wish I could say it did. I am strong, and I can make this the new normal. I think..... It would help tremendously if I weren't sick! Talk about bad timing! Double UGH! I haven't felt good since Saturday....I have things to do and places to be the rest of the week, here's hoping my cocktail of day/nyquil works!

Cheers!

Snowmageddeon

Well....hubby left Monday, and it's been quite the adventure for both of us ever since. The mother of all weather storms was hitting the Midwest, which changed hubby's course of driving. Yes driving. In the middle of winter. Across the US. So instead of the quick route he normally would take, he was forced to go South, and has since been stuck in Dallas for the past 3 days waiting for the weather to break. They aren't used to this type of weather there, and consequently do not treat their roads in an adequate manner. 10% Salt, 90% Sand. WHAT? They claim that the salt is too corrosive, which it is really corrosive, to use much of it. Well, then what exactly is the point of using it at all? This weather happens so infrequently there, that you would think they would go ahead and use at the very least 80-85% Salt. Who ever is in charge needs to have a stern talking to. This is ludicrous!

My week has been one adventure after another. The headlight went out in my car, as did the lamp post and my ceiling fan. Got the latter two changed no problem...had to ask my neighbor for help with my car....I'm not good with cars...I'm a girly girl, what can I say? Then my awesome son clogged the toilet. That awesomeness was extra awesome, because I had to go buy a decent plunger. I won that round I'm happy to say. Next was my personal favorite. Caught a mouse in the mouse trap in the garage. I have NO idea how long that poor little thing had been in it. I haven't checked it since hubby left. I happened to get something off the shelf today and looked down and about had a heart attack! We do have a humane trap...Thank GOD, because I know I'd freak if it were the other kind. Wonder how many more are roaming my garage? Ugh.........

This evening we tried out Skype for the first time. Our camera make us look like blurry blobs, but he looks A-OK. I have to say, I am stoked to see him, but at the same time heart broken that I can't touch him. I can't smell him. You have no idea how hard it is to see him, and talk to him face to face and not feel his arms around me. I know other people have it MUCH worse than me, and I should be greatful for what we have, and I am. I really am. For now, this is our new normal, and I just need to get acclimated to it. One. Step. At. A. Time.

And he's off

It's been 26 hours and 10 minutes give or take since hubby left for the wild wild West. Not that I'm keeping track.....ok, yes I am. It was hard. Really hard to say goodbye. He's had to leave before for a couple of months at a time, but this time was different. It was hard on both of us. I can't really put my finger on it, as to the specific reason. I would venture to guess because it's the beginning of a new chapter of our lives. Not just any chapter, a huge monumental chapter. And he's doing it on his own for now. The kids and are are still here, in our house, in our little town. Just the three of us. There are SO many things left to be done. It's overwhelming...for example, right now...I should be painting something. But I'm not. I'm not ready to take on that task yet. I did hang a couple of pictures and patch 3 holes. Something has to be better than nothing, right?

So today is day one down....lots more to go. One step at a time. I can do this!

The cat's out of the bag, and other such things

So much is going on....the cat is out of the bag....and my head is spinning. The kids took it about as well as I imagined about our impending move. Zack was crushed. Taylor was ambivalent at the time. Now I think the weight of all the changes is having a negative affect on her. She seems to be regressing back to when my inlaws first split up. My father in law has been pretty much mia, showing up only when it's convenient to him. She went through a period of acting out at school. This time she is super clingy and doesn't want me out of her sight. Now she's getting hit with more changes...bigger changes. I know how she's feeling. I just wish I could help her a little more. I do my best to reassure her, however it doesn't always work. One step at a time, right?

Today is hubby going away lunch. I was supposed to be there. Mother Nature seemed to have other plans for me. I got all the way down there and turned around and came back. The roads were getting bad, and I didn't want to wait around for them to get worse. Fear is a horrible thing. I'm sure I could have managed, but my fear got the best of me. I was scared of getting stuck either there where the lunch was or on the interstate, or worse in a wreck. I'm such a negative Nancy. I cried all the way home. The weight of knowing he's leaving in 5 days, plus the weather, plus the state our house is in, just all came crashing down. And I really wanted to be there. It's time to put my big girl panties on and deal.

Birthday boy

My birthday boy is turning 9 on the 17th. I can't believe it! I swear he was just a baby yesterday. When did get get so tall? When did his feet get so darn big? They're nearly as big as mine. He's going thru a growth spurt right now. He started out the year in size 8. He got off the bus the other day and they were up to his ankles! When did this happen? How?? Goodness...I'm not ready for him to get any bigger. He really is a sweet kid. He wears his feelings on his sleeve, and he's a smarty pants. Not that I'm biased....

I'm in the middle of trying to plan his birthday party. It's going to be the last one here, so we want to make it special for him. Oh my goodness.....I don't really want to go broke doing it. But I fear I'm headed in that direction. A bounce house, games, pizza and cake. I think. lol I'm on the fence about the bounce house, because that's what's so expensive....but go big or go home, right? I better think fast, the party is next Saturday!

Is it wrong that I am typing this and watching Zack and Cody on Deck? And laughing? Out loud? Shhhhhh, don't' tell.

2011

It's a new year...ready set go! Is everyone ready? I'm not. 2011 is going to be a big year. Huge. A little scary. One of our biggest adventures yet. We're moving....Hubby is supposed to leave by the end of the month and there is soooooooooo much to do. Every weekend is jam packed...two weekends away, plus Zack's birthday. It's overwhelming to think about, but I guess I need to get used to it and start packing some things to de-clutter the house. It's amazing how much stuff you accumulate over time-especially with kids. :) We still haven't told the kids we're leaving yet. We are chicken...how horrible is that?! I feel like a crappy mom....there is never a right time. We just have to do it and get it over with.

This week, Taylor is home. She had tonsils and adenoids taken out and tubes put in her ears last Monday. She is doing better...yesterday was the first day she didn't take any pain medicine. Wooo Hooo! Everyone tells me that after she heals she will be like a different kid. I'm still waiting....guess I have another few days to go....I'm hoping for the best. She needs a break! So does Mommy!